Big Buffy
by spikeismylover
Summary: Big Brother, BtVS style, what will happen when a group of strangers are all put together in the house....
1. Default Chapter

This is practically like big brother but no one knows who each other is Everyone gets on well but Spike and Angel have to hide their identities from the others I hope you all like it it's my first story ever so enjoy. Chapter One Getting to know you

Evening of The First Day

"Nice place." Said Spike to an empty room, as he was the first one in the building.

He chucked his suitcases on the floor and flopped down onto an armchair in the middle of the room.

"Could use a few touches here and there, brighten the place up good and proper." 

Suddenly the front door was pushed open by another person arriving, suitcases under her arms and bags in her hands yet she didn't seem to be handling it so bad. She looked around the place and smiled.

 "Big room, probably won't feel like it when it starts to fill up," She said

The two blondes looked at each other.

"Yeah, I'm William by the way most people call me Spike. Don't ask why nasty business." He replied.

"Buffy Summers. What's your last name?"

"Don't have one."

"O-kay," said Buffy

Buffy sighed and put her luggage next to the door, walked downstairs and sat next to Spike on the sofa.

"So Spike where do you come from?" She asked sweetly, staring at him.

"Oh, England. Can't you tell by the accent," He grinned.

"What part?" she asked interestedly 

Before he got to answer a red haired girl came in with heavy bags.

"Oh hey. I'm Willow."

"Buffy, and this is Spike." Answered Buffy. 

"Would you like some help with those?"  Buffy asked staring at the cases the red head was struggling to carry. 

"Oh yes please these are killing me it feels like my arms are about to tear off." Said Willow sounding very exhausted.

Buffy pulled herself off of the sofa and grabbed Spike's arm playfully so he would go and help her.

He sighed and rolled his eyes and decided he might as well since he wasn't doing anything.

She and Spike took hold of her suitcases from under Willows arms while Willow dropped her other bags to the ground.

"Thanks guys, my last name's Rosenberg. What are yours?" She asked.

"Summers." Replied Buffy

"Ain't got one." Said Spike.

"Okay." Said Willow a little weird. " Why don't you tell me a little about yourselves then."

"Well." Said Buffy starting. "I'm from L.A, I like to go shopping a lot and I love going to discos to dance for hours."

"I like to fight and watch the programme Passions, did you know Timmy fell down the well?" asked Spike.

Willow and Buffy's eyebrows lifted up at the word "Passions" because they thought the programme was really sappy.

"Okay you do know I meant to say Friends and that Rachel is starting to like Joey?" He said covering up what he had just said.

"Oh yeah I love that show, I think it's funny when Joey laughs at Ross whenever he says Homo erectus." Said Willow.

"Yeah and……." Spike and Willow started talking for a while.

Buffy didn't like the idea they were getting on so well.

"Hey I like Friends too." She said looking at Spike.

"Okay what was your favourite episode?" Smiled Spike.

"The very first one where Rachel comes into the Central Perk and Chandler goes, I just one million dollars and he does that silly arm thing,"

Suddenly the door burst open a man with dark brown hair came in his hair stuck up really high even though it was short. "Angel." He said to everyone.

"Who?" asked Buffy.

"That's my name." He replied.

"Bit girly isn't it?"  Asked Spike.

Angel just stared at Spike. They both knew that they were vampires just didn't say anything.

"Anyway." Interrupted Willow. "What's your last name?"

"Don't have one." Said Angel chucking his bags on the floor and plonking into the other armchair.

The door opened again and a man with glasses came in with just one suitcase. "Oh urm, Rupert Giles." He waved.

"Buffy."

"Willow,"

"Angel."

"Bugger off."

"Excuse me?" said Rupert shocked.

"I said Spike. Who invited grand dad to the party," Said Spike sarcastically.

Giles put his case down gently next to everybody else's. He sat down in-between Buffy and Willow and rubbed his hands.

"So what does everyone like to do in their spare time?" asked Giles

"Well I like to dance and fight a lot Ur Ur I mean um shopping a lot." Stammered Buffy worried that she had revealed too much about herself.

Spike stared at her and arched an eyebrow, as if he knew what she really was.

"Mmmm…" he said to himself.

Buffy took a quick glance at him and turned away again. "Urm Spike why don't you tell Giles about yourself." She said.

"Oh no, you don't want to know about me I'm a boring person. Angel wants to show and tell, he's not boring." Spike said Smugly  

"Huh?" Asked Angel confused.

"Go on Angel you haven't told us about you yet." Smiled Willow.

Angel smiled weakly, wondering what to say. "I-I…. um."

The doors burst open and in stumbled a brunette and a blonde dropping all their bags and suitcases out of their arms.

The brunette looked up and grinned at everyone. 

" Hi people. Xander's the name being sarcastic is my game." He said proudly.

"Hi I'm Anya, a typical collage girl with no friends, I like having lots of orgasms."

Beamed the blonde patting Xander on the back hopefully.

Xander looked at everyone his face had turned bright red with embarrassment.

"Yes, but now everybody will think you're some kinda crazy lust bunny and –."

"Ewww! Bunnies!"  Anya said disgustedly.

" Which are disgusting because?"  Asked Xander, not getting it.

Anya ignored him and walked further into the room.

"Okay, talk about paranoid." Said Buffy.

"Tell me about it." Replied Spike. "Anyway poofta, tell us about yourself or I'm going to bed."

He said turning his head to Angel.

"No I'm boring just like you." Said Angel, staring at him.

"Oh come on Angel please." Said Buffy squeezing his hand.

Spike saw that she liked Angel so Spike took a hold of Buffy's hand. She looked at him and smiled.

She let go of Angel's hand and leaned back on the sofa

"Okay… Well this is hard. I um like to watch TV and Drink blood." Said Angel

Everyone looked at him and freaked out and started inching away from him. Spike smiled widely at Angel, as he knew he just embarrassed himself.If vampires could blush Angel would be bright red right now.

"Bloody, did I say blood? I meant bloody beer." He said all manly and tough.

"Okay." Said Buffy clinging onto Spikes arm to get away from Angel.

"I'm gonna go to bed now." She picked herself up from the sofa and walked into the girl's room.

Spike looked at Angel wickedly. "She's never gonna want you now mate,"

"Spike, do you wanna come and talk with me a while?" asked Buffy.

"See." Said Spike and walked off to join Buffy.

The door opened again and a girl came in carrying a large rucksack over one shoulder.

She was dressed in a pair of dark red leather trousers and black shirt with a murky blue denim jacket

Over it.

"Hi, I'm Faith." She waved.

"I'm Angel, here let me help you with that." He said getting up and running to her almost tripping over his feet.

"Thanks, I'm beat from the trip." She replied.

She took off her coat and placed it on the bags where Angel had positioned them.

She sat down next to Giles and smiled.

"Mr. Giles." He said holding out his hand.

She shook it hard.

"I'm Willow Rosenberg." Said Willow leaning over Giles and shook Faith's hand.

"Hi Will."

"Xander, nice to meet you." He smiled widely and shook her hand.

"I'm Anya. I don't shake hands." She said looking at her jealously not liking the fact that Xander was looking at Faiths shirt an awful lot.

"The others are in the bedroom talking. Their names are Spike and Buffy." Said Willow

"William the Bloody." Said Faith under her breath as she looked at the door.

"William the who-y?" asked Xander looking confused.

She turned around and looked at him. "Oh nothing, it doesn't matter." She said.

(The Girls Room)

Spike and Buffy were cross-legged on one of the beds in the far off corner.

"How old are you?" asked Buffy curiously.

"126." He replied.

"Huh?!"

"Uh I mean 32." 

"Oh… you don't look it though." Said Buffy

"Well how old do you think I look?" He asked squeezing her hand.

"Like you just turned 28." She replied smiling and staring into his eyes squeezing his hand in return.

"Well that knocks off a few years doesn't it?" Said Spike.

Some hours had past. Spike and Buffy were still talking and some more guests had arrived.

"So Tara why don't you tell us about yourself." Said Willow.

Tara smiled shyly and said. " I like to um draw and I help out a lot of the time in some places 

All that kind of stuff." She replied.

"Well Tar' I think you're gonna be just fine here." Said Faith smiling at her encouragingly.

"How about you Dawnie?" asked Willow. "What do you do for a living?"  

"Nothing much, just hang out with friends and sneak out of the house at night." She replied.

"Oh cool, I used to do the same thing, I went to this place called.' The Bronze' that place is wild at night I still go there sometimes." Said Willow.

"Hey those guy's have been in there for quite some time maybe someone should go and check on' em." Said Faith tilting her head to the door.

"I'll check." Said Willow.

She picked herself up from the sofa and opened the door a crack.

The lights were out and Spike and Buffy were lying in each other's arms fast asleep.

"Awwe, that's so cute." Willow cooed.

"What?" Asked Dawn.

"They've only just met and they're sleeping together already, oh, but not in the lets have sex sense," Willow replied awkwardly as she realised what she'd just said.

"Where let me see." Said Dawn walking to the door.

She looked inside the dark room and saw them on the bed beside the door.

"The guy's kinda hot too isn't he?" asked Dawn.

"I wouldn't know." Willow replied.

"Oh." Said Dawn

"So lets see what they what they have to eat around here." Said Xander rubbing his hands.

He walked into the kitchen and opened a cupboard door.It was bare.

"Okay I guess the old Mother Hubbard can't give the dog a bone." He said disappointingly.

"Huh?" Asked Dawn.

She looked into the cupboard.

"I'm glad a bought a large box of Jelly beans now." She said.

"Well I'm gonna go talk to big brother. Before I go in, is there anything you guys want?" asked Faith

"Yeah how's about some Chinese." Said Xander.

"Oh good choice, and some Caramel chocolate." Said Dawn

"Nah, too hot for that." Said Faith.

Dawn frowned and folded her arms. 

"I'd love some chocolate painting stuff so I could lick it all off of Xanders chest." Said Anya.

Everyone stared at her, Dawn did a gagging sound.

"I wish I never mentioned it now." Said Dawn.

"Well I'd quite like some Black pudding." Said Angel.

"Ooo, what's that?" asked Dawn.

"It's a black sausage thing," Said Willow.

"Yes it's an English thing, made with mostly pigs blood if I remember rightly," said Giles.

"Ewww, sorry I asked," said Dawn

" I wouldn't mind having Dark chocolate you know those ones in a box with two layers."

Said Tara.

"Oh that sounds nice." Said Willow.

"And some alcohol." Said Faith.

"Reef." Said Willow. "Orange."

"I don't drink." Said Dawn quietly.

"Well we'll just get you some orange juice." Said Willow.

"Oh and we need breakfast for tomorrow." Said Xander.

"Okay that's enough I can't remember everything." Said Faith.

"So that was Black pudding, Dark Chocolate, Orange Reefs, Orange Juice and Chinese and I would like some Baileys

And Strawberries and cream."

"doughnuts for me," Said Xander

Faith nodded her head and went into the room.

_Hello faith and what do you want to talk to us about?_

"Well I was kinda hopin' we could get some food in the house cos we seem to be runnin' low." She joked. 

_What would you like?_

"Okay let me think. Oh yeah we would like some Chinese, Dark chocolate, orange juice for the kid-

"I am not a kid!!!" Yelled Dawn from the other room. 

Faith ignored her and carried on. " Thought this room was supposed to be soundproofed, anyway I was saying, Orange and Berry Reefs and Black pudding, also we'd like strawberries in cream."

And what do Buffy and Spike want? 

"Oh um we don't know cos they're fast asleep in the girls room, seems like they have a thing going on already." 

Faith replied.

Oh, is that all you'd like to say then? 

"Yes, thank you big brother, Um do you have a girlfriend or anything by any chance cos you seem like a nice guy."

She asked.

_Uh that would be all._

"Nah, I'm just kiddin' with you anyway." Faith said. Okay 

"Sleaze Bag." She whispered under her breath as she walked out the door.

Suddenly another blonde girl came in drenched from head to the toe from the rain outside.

She dropped her bags to the floor and waved. "Hi everyone I'm Harmony an we're all going to be great friends".

Xander took one look at her and fainted.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2, A Bit Too Much

Chapter 2  
  
A Bit Too Much  
  
(In The girl's room)  
  
Buffy suddenly awoke as she heard laughing in the other room.  
  
"What?" asked Spike rubbing his eyes.  
  
"I think we should go into the other room now, we've been in here a rather long time." She said yawning.  
  
"Yeah you're right." He said sitting up.  
  
Buffy and Spike picked themselves up off of the bed and opened the door.  
  
"Look who decided to join us," Joked Faith.  
  
"Yeah, well it was rather a tiring day." Said Buffy.  
  
Faith raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Depends what you've been doing to make you tired," said Faith  
  
"Oh, not that kind of way." Said Spike.  
  
Buffy frowned, not so sure she like the new girl, she looked around the room, noticing the other new arrivals.  
  
"Anyway lets take our minds off that. Hey would you guys like a drink?" Asked Faith.  
  
"Yeah, sure," said Buffy casually.  
  
"Got any beers?" Asked Spike.  
  
"Sorry," shrugged Faith  
  
"What Flavour we got orange or berry?" Said Willow, holding up a couple of bottles.  
  
"Orange, if I have to," Spike replied.  
  
"I'll have the same." Said Buffy.  
  
Faith chucked one at them and they caught it.  
  
Buffy took a huge swig and did a loud burp. "Whop, Excuse me."  
  
Spike smiled at her.  
  
"I also have a bottle of vodka, brought it as the one personal item I was allowed," Said Faith.  
  
"Great," Said Buffy finishing her drink.  
  
(A few hours later)  
  
Everyone was terribly drunk and talking about his or her funniest moments.  
  
The older guy Giles was dancing around the room with a pair of pants on his head.  
  
"You really shouldn't let old people drink," said Xander.  
  
"Well I guess that leaves us out, eh Angel," said Spike looking at his fellow vamp.  
  
"I don't get your meaning," said Angel innocently.  
  
Dawn was getting bored because she was still sober and not allowed any drink. Buffy was by now, sitting on Spikes lap with her hand on his chest and stroking it gently.  
  
"Lets talk about our most wonderful moments now." Buffy said.  
  
"Oh, is it a game? I love games, my most wonderful moment was when they had a sale on Prada handbags.." Said Harmony.  
  
Xander backed away from the blonde airhead in fear. Faith stuck her fingers down her throat in a gagging motion.  
  
"Mine was seeing you for the first time." Spike said looking at Buffy.  
  
"Awww, you're so sweet." She said kissing him passionately on the lips.  
  
"Oooh" said Tara and Willow.  
  
"I think someone's in love," Said Xander.  
  
"Well, the amount of time they've spent alone, they must have already done the hot sweaty thing," said Anya.  
  
Buffy pulled her mouth away from Spikes and smiled at everyone.  
  
Angel looked at the couple in jealousy, as he too liked Buffy.  
  
"Well let's just hope not, because you two don't look very good together." Angel replied.  
  
"What d'ya mean, I think that they look good together, especially with the snuggles it looks real sweet." Said Willow.  
  
"He's just jealous, aren't you poofta I told you she'd never want you." Said Spike.  
  
Angel looked at him in anger; he almost got into his game face when Harmony said.  
  
"Spike is so Horney.Did I just say that out loud." Giggled Harmony  
  
Faith took the drink out of Harmony's hand.  
  
"I am cutting you off babe," said Faith.  
  
"Hey!" said Harmony.  
  
"Maybe you should do the same for Rupes out there," groaned Spike as Rupert started singing Beatles songs with a drunken slur.  
  
Harmony was sitting over with Dawn talking about boys and a lot of other girly things. The blonde girl was starting to get to Dawn; she was too shallow even for Dawn's tastes.  
  
"That Spike guy is cute, I could make him my little blondie bear," whispered Harmony to Dawn.  
  
"Yeah right, whatever," said Dawn  
  
"Did you bring your diary with you?" asked Harmony.  
  
"Yeah I never go anywhere without it." Replied Dawn.  
  
"If you let me read yours, you can read mine." Said Harmony.  
  
The girls grabbed their bags and went into the girl's room.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Dawn looked at the cover of Harmony's Diary.  
  
It was pink with pictures of unicorns and flowers and at the top was Harmony's name in stylish writing.  
  
She lifted her eyebrows in shock.  
  
Harmony looked at the front cover of Dawns diary, it was brown with the words "Dawn's Journal" engraved in gold letters on it.  
  
"Your front covers boring." She whined.  
  
"At least my doesn't have ponies on it." Said Dawn.  
  
"They're unicorns." Harmony corrected.  
  
"Well at least I don't have'em." Said Dawn.  
  
"Okay lets just stop talking and read." Said Harmony.  
  
Dawn started reading the first few lines of Harmony's diary, and fell fast asleep.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"I am so wasted," Said Faith.  
  
"Tell me about it, um have you got anymore vodka?" Asked Buffy.  
  
"Yeah there's a drop in the bottom of the bottle," Said Faith  
  
"Uh huh, give me all of it then," Said Buffy looking eagerly at the bottle in Faith's hand.  
  
Faith laughed, and threw her the bottle.  
  
"Haven't you had enough luv?" asked Spike.  
  
"Leave her alone William, little miss uppity looks like she doesn't get a whole bunch of fun," Said Faith.  
  
"How did you know my real name?" asked Spike.  
  
His question was for gotten as Tara and Willow screamed in shock.  
  
"What the bloody hell is the matter with you two?" asked Spike.  
  
"Look!" the girls said in unison.  
  
They all turned to see Giles in the garden stripping off and about to jump in the pool naked.  
  
"That it, no more drink for him, period," said Angel  
  
"Should have had a drink Angel, might have got rid of some of that, I'm never gonna get the girl broodiness," said Spike.  
  
"Spike, did you ever know that I think you're a right old git?" Said Angel.  
  
"What'd you mean you're over two hundred years old." Laughed Spike.  
  
"What???!!" the others all turned to look at Angel.  
  
"I feel sick," groaned Buffy.  
  
"Uh oh, this is not gonna have a happy ending, some people just can't hold their liquor," said Faith smugly.  
  
Buffy leaned over the back of the chair and was sick on the floor, she looked up to see Faith's amused expression, and had the feeling that the dark haired girl had played her, she had just vomited front of millions of viewers. Faith was so gonna get hers, thought Buffy to herself.  
  
That was her last coherent thought, as she passed out in Spike's arms. Spike picked her up and carried her to her room, Dawn and Harmony were fast asleep in there. He laid Buffy gently down on the bed and covered her up with her quilt. He switched out the light and closed the door.  
  
TBC 


End file.
